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Universal Health Care Is the Moral Thing To Do

Wednesday, October 28, 2009
posted by Loren A. Olson M.D.

At one time it might have been considered blasphemous for a physician to talk about supporting universal health care, but more and more physicians are realizing that the current system of healthcare has failed us.  As long as physicians are paid by the number of services they perform, the temptation will remain for physicians to perform more services than are necessary and to select from those patients whose insurance reimburses at the highest rates.  I found the following article to be a useful summary of the current healthcare issues.

Loren Olson

 

National Physicians Alliance

 (From www.OpposingViews.com)

In a recent presidential debate, the candidates were asked, “Is health care a right or a responsibility?” The National Physicians Alliance believes it is both. Yet in the United States, formidable barriers stand between patients and ideal medical care. Not only is it difficult for many people to acquire health insurance, but even those with coverage are seeing costs rise.

At a time when patients and their families are already overwhelmed by the financial, emotional, and time demands of interacting with today’s health care system, a movement is underway to make the situation even worse. Insurers and corporations are sneakily shifting the financial burden onto everyday Americans by driving patients into high deductible, high co-pay plans that offer little protection when a person actually needs medical care.  Half of all bankruptcies are now due to medical problems, and in most of these cases, the person declaring bankruptcy had medical insurance.  This trend of burden-shifting has been promoted under the misleading label of “consumer-directed health care.”  Make no mistake: these plans benefit influential insurers and payers, at a high price to actual consumers.  The new Medicare drug plan and “health savings accounts” are two prominent examples of this effort to shift costs to patients—and both are contributing to the dissolution of what it even means to be insured.  The United States may be approaching a time when the word “insured” is nothing but an empty shell, useful for political tabulations but meaningless for patients.  The NPA believes we must have true patient-driven health care by resisting high-deductible health plan proposals and prioritizing accessible, high quality health care for all people.

There are many different options to finance and administer guaranteed, quality, affordable health care and mechanism has its own advantages and disadvantages.  Thus, we endorse the five principles of health care reform identified by the Institute of Medicine as the basis for a just and moral health care system:

1.    Health care coverage should be universal.

1.    No one should be excluded based on poor health status, a pre-existing condition or chronic illness.

2.     There should be few or no administrative barriers to obtaining or renewing insurance.

3.     Coverage should be guaranteed to all persons in the United States.

2.    Health care coverage should be continuous.

1.    Everyone should have access to a primary care provider and medical home throughout their lifespan.

2.    Continuous coverage must be transportable across employment, unemployment or geographic relocation.

3.    Health care coverage should be affordable to individuals and families.

1.    Every American should have access to insurance premium they can afford.  Financial assistance will be necessary for lower-income people.

2.     Co-pays and deductibles present a barrier to care for low-income people. They tend to discourage people from obtaining necessary medical care. We oppose co-payments that impose significant financial barriers to care.

4.    The health insurance strategy should be affordable and sustainable for society.

1.    Physicians and other health care providers must place renewed emphasis on the stewardship of clinical resources.

2.    Costs should be distributed equitably across the entire population.

3.    Any reform should minimize administrative cost, and simplify enrollment, underwriting, and billing procedures.

4.    The government should be able to negotiate prices with pharmaceutical and medical device companies to ensure quality, low-cost medications for all.

5.    Health insurance should enhance health and well-being by promoting access to high-quality care that is effective, efficient, safe, timely, patient-centered, and equitable.

1.    Basic benefit packages must include preventive and screening services, prescription drugs, dental care, and mental health care as well as outpatient and hospital services.

2.    Payment strategies should promote evidence-based medical care.

3.    Reforms such as malpractice reform should promote patient safety and enhance patient care.

Evidence

Institute of Medicine

Insuring America’s Health: Principles and Recommendations. Washington D.C.: National Academy Press, 2004.

 

To read the rest of this discussion and read opposing views, click here: 

 http://tinyurl.com/yz9gojd

Obama Wasting Money on Gays “Who Won’t Live Long Enough

Tuesday, October 27, 2009
posted by Loren A. Olson M.D.

This following article from the Family Reserach Council, the self-described ”defenders of faith, family and freedom”  is so disgusting, I don’t need to make a comment, but I will.  The FRC is so wrong on so many different levels.  Being gay is not a “life style.”  A lack of tolerance pushes men who have sex with men into the underground where the risks of HIV are much greater  http://www.bestgayblogs.com/2009/06/featured-political-blogs/tolerance-reduces-risk-of-hiv/  To consider it “a waste” to dedicate an amount of $250,000 to develop programs for increasing numbers of senior LGBT people is disgusting, and to think they consider themselves the “defenders of family,” as if we don’t have families and are not a part of their families.

Loren Olson

Before we entrust Secretary Kathleen Sebelius with health care reform, maybe Americans should take a closer look at how her Department spends other taxpayer dollars. Even The Washington Post called Friday’s announcement from Health and Human Services (HHS) an “eye opener,” writing that the President’s “gay outreach continues.” A $1.4 trillion deficit aside, HHS has set aside a quarter million dollars to launch the first-ever National Resource Center for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Elders.

Apparently, our nation is never too broke to advance a radical social agenda. The agency released a statement on the Center last week, saying its purpose would be to “help community-based organizations understand the unique needs… of older LGBT individuals and assist them in implementing programs for local service providers…”

In the release, HHS regurgitates the Left’s propaganda to justify the waste, claiming that “1.5 to 4 million” LGBTs are age 60 and older. In reality, HHS has no idea how many LGBT seniors exist. No one does! The movement is only a few decades old, and people who are 80- or 90-years-old didn’t grow up in a culture where it was acceptable to identify with this lifestyle.

Family Research Council

Tony Perkins of the Family Research Council

 

Of course, the real tragedy here–apart from the unnecessary spending–is that, given the risks of homosexual conduct, few of these people are likely to live long enough to become senior citizens!

Yet once again, the Obama administration is rushing to reward a lifestyle that poses one of the greatest public health risks in America. If this is how HHS prioritizes, imagine what it could do with a trillion dollar health care overhaul!

To read more on this topic, click here:  http://tiny.cc/hrEZK

Can Your Diet Make You Happy?

Monday, October 26, 2009
posted by Loren A. Olson M.D.

By Vanessa Barrington, EcoSalon. Posted October 26, 2009.

 

 From www.AlterNet.org

 

Wanna be happy and kick Prozac to the curb? Start eating your fruits and vegetables, nuts, whole grains, beans, fish and olive oil. We’ve long known that a Mediterranean diet is good for the heart, but it turns out it’s also good for the mood.

In a study published earlier this month, Spanish researchers looked at the diets of 10,000 people and found those who mainly ate a Mediterranean diet had lower depression rates than those who did not. The study compiled data from Spanish people who reported their dietary intake on a questionnaire between 1999 and 2005.

To read the rest of the article, click here:

 Can Your Diet Make You Happy? | Health and Wellness | AlterNet

50 Years Of Pentagon Studies Support Gay Soldiers

Sunday, October 25, 2009
posted by Loren A. Olson M.D.
From “The Atlantic”

 Oct 20 2009, 4:00 pm by Shauna Miller

 In a new paper on the efficacy of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” published in this month’s Joint Force Quarterly, Col. Om Prakash boils down half a century of Pentagon-commissioned studies on gays in the military into seven short pages. Reviewing the research, he finds that the facts of gay servicemembers’ fitness to serve have changed little over 50 years. But the reports themselves reveal something more: The Defense Department’s own criticisms of military policies toward gay soldiers have remained consistent, too.

The DoD has funded studies on the impact of gay servicemembers as far back as 1957, when the Navy’s Crittenden Report found “no factual data” to support the idea that they posed a greater security risk than heterosexual personnel. Straight officers boasting secrets due to “feelings of inadequacy” were a realer threat, it found. Despite these findings, the report recommended no changes to dismissal policies, for a reason that would define the department’s stance on open service into the 21st century: “The service should not move ahead of civilian society nor attempt to set substantially different standards in attitude or action with respect to homosexual offenders.”

In 1988, the Defense Personnel Security Research Center — a DoD agency — conducted its own study on gay soldiers to determine whether their service under current policies created security risks, for instance in terms of blackmail. It also discussed, based on the military and wider social data available, whether the military’s policies were sustainable. The study returned again and again to the facts of conduct: “Studies of homosexual veterans make clear that having a same gender or an opposite-gender orientation is unrelated to job performance in the same way as is being left or right-handed.”

To read the rest of the article, click here:

http://politics.theatlantic.com/2009/10/50_years_of_pentagon_studies_support_gay_soldier.php#

Gay Couples Get Hit in the Pocketbook. Repeatedly.

Saturday, October 24, 2009
posted by Loren A. Olson M.D.

Oct 24th, 2009 | By Velvet Blade | Read more in: GLBTQ

Gay Couples Get Hit in the Pocketbook. Repeatedly.
Winning the right to marry in several states is certainly a step in the right direction towards equal treatment. However, until the federal government acknowledges unions between ALL COUPLES as marriages, with all the same rights on a local, state and federal level, we have a long, long way to go. Currently, gay couples consistently pay much more in taxes, benefits, legal fees and insurance than their heterosexual married counterparts. Civil unions don’t protect you fully and neither do domestic partnerships. The definition of these two “alternatives” varies widely from state to state. Marriage is marriage is marriage.
Recently in their Money section, the New York Times ran an article entitled The Higher Lifetime Costs of Being a Gay Couple, (http://www.nytimes.com/2009/10/03/your-money/03money.html). I’m not gonna lie. It pissed me off. The Times hypothetical worst case scenario costs a lesbian couple a whopping $467,000 more over the course of their committed relationship than their straight counterparts — almost half a million dollars is the cost of being with your same-sex partner. (That’s some big, beautiful house, eh?)
This article puts things into a black and white perspective and clearly shows an element of continuing discrimination simply because we choose partners of the same sex. The NYT investigation looked at the obvious culprits, but considering that there are over 1,138 federal protections, rights and benefits that are based solely on marital status, no investigation could possibly cover all the ways in which we… well… get screwed.
With all the debates raging around health care, I think the additional money we pay in health insurance costs is a timely point to make. For instance, even if your company allows your same-sex partner to be added to your health care benefits, your partner’s portion of the premium will be taxed. An employee with a heterosexual spouse, pays the premium for their partner with pre-tax dollars. This can be a substantial difference. I looked into adding my partner to my employer’s health insurance (my employer allowed for same-sex couples to be covered, but did not contribute to that coverage), and my premium would have risen over 400%… and I would have been taxed on that increase! If my partner had a child that I provided for, my premium (taxed) would have increased 800%.
Perhaps this is why a recent UCLA study found that “individuals in unmarried partnerships are substantially less likely to have health insurance than their married counterparts.” http://www.lawcrossing.com/article/3821/Who-s-More-Likely-to-Be-Uninsured-It-s-Not-Who-You-Think-/ . This means straight as well as gay couples, but the straight couples have a choice, whereas homosexual couples do not. This being the case, yet another all-too-real expense that same-sex couples might endure is the increased financial risk of having a major health issue for an uninsured partner. Considering that premiums for health care have continued to increase (they have grown by 87% since 2000 based on a study done by the Kaiser Family Foundation), many people are priced out of the health insurance market. Obviously salaries have not kept up.
I was in a ten-year relationship with a woman who had a son (my “sonish”) from a prior heterosexual marriage.  While we were together, I provided the majority of the housing, food and clothing for my “sonish”. If I’d had the same role in a straight marriage, I would have been able to claim 3 dependents, earned-income credit (EIC), other deductions and his student loan when he went off to college.  As it was, I could claim nothing. In fact, for the majority of those ten years, I had to file single status and could not even claim “Head of Household” despite being so.
Only recently did my home state of Oregon begin to allow me to claim a non-working same-sex partner as a dependent. Since state deductions are based on federal returns, I have to fill out an additional “dummy” return as if I were in a married hetro-couple. A same-sex couple incurs more tax preparation costs because they can file jointly in their state (if the state recognizes same-sex couples on tax returns) but still must file as single on the federal return and additionally prepare this “dummy” federal joint return. That’s four tax returns versus two for a married couple.
If you own a house with a mortgage and one partner pays the mortgage and taxes, but isn’t named on the mortgage itself, the entire deduction is lost for federal taxes. The partner holding the mortgage can’t claim it, nor can the one paying it. A straight married couple can claim this deduction. Depending on the size of your mortgage and the value of your property, this is another substantial financial loss for same-sex couples.
Feel like you’re on a merry-go-round spinning far too fast? Dizzy after jumping through so many queer hoops? Here’s more:
If you dissolve your same-sex marriage, civil union or DP and get a ‘divorce’ you lose once again. With heterosexual couples, the home gets split as do other assets and there are no tax consequences. For a same-sex couple, if the house is split, the state might accept that as non-taxable, but the IRS will either see half of the house as a gift (possibly taxable depending upon the amount) or compensation for “services rendered” which would also be taxable. And “services rendered”?!! I find that more than a little insulting…
If alimony is ordered, the state will let the partner paying alimony write it off if that state recognizes same-sex couples, but the federal government doesn’t. Again, alimony for gays, even if ordered by a court, would be considered a gift or “services rendered” and be taxable… Three times, as it turns out… once when it is earned, and again when it is paid (since the IRS won’t let you use the deduction), and another time when it is received. The partner receiving the alimony income has to decide how to file it with the IRS:  as alimony income, other income or self-employed income.
Each year, it is estimated that same-sex couples pay approximately 25% more per year than their heterosexual counterparts in taxes alone. Needless to say, this all adds up over the course of a couple’s lifetime. Feeling pissed off yet?
Those 1,138 benefits and protections aren’t just about taxes. They also include things like Social Security benefits (monthly income, death benefits and survivorship), immigration policy, Family Medical Leave Act, Worker’s Compensation survivorship benefits, pensions and on and on…
I know a gay couple who are multi-millionaires who have been together for 25 years. They can afford to hire the best attorneys and experts to make sure they are covered and protected to the best ability of the law, even though all their preparations may still fall short. My point? A straight married couple gets these protections automatically, whereas we have to pay for them out of pocket and still never come close. You can expect to spend anywhere from $5,000 to $25,000 or more in extra legal and accounting fees depending upon your circumstances. Most couples opt for less expensive ways to protect themselves – wills online, free legal forms, cheap attorneys (now that’s an oxymoron), putting each other on as many pieces of property with survivorship as possible (house, cars, etc.), holding life insurance policies with each other as beneficiaries (this will likely be taxed as well), submitting statements and living wills to doctors and hospitals stating that this person is your partner and should be treated as a spouse, etc.
Adding insult to injury are all the heterosexual couples who choose to get married to take advantage of spousal benefits and tax breaks. So much for the sanctity of marriage… These examples are all people I know:
A young man enters the military and finds he will be shipped off to a war zone. A friend of his is a single mother. He marries her so she will have commissary benefits, housing, health and other military benefits, and also a death benefit should he not return home. His view? If something happens to him, those benefits may as well benefit someone in need.
A young couple would rather wait a year to get married, but decide to have a court house wedding earlier so that she can be placed on his employer’s health plan. Their view? We hardly make ends meet as it is and this would save us hundreds of dollars per month.
A couple decides to get married because they would like to buy a house and the area they chose does not allow for unmarried couples of any orientation. Also, their mortgage as a married couple gives them substantial tax benefits that they would not get if they continued to live together and not be married. Their view? We plan on getting married anyway. Might as well move up the time line and gain benefits while saving money now rather than later.
Another young couple gets married two years before their chosen schedule to take advantage of tax breaks and employer-based health care as she prepares to work for the state and he makes next to nothing. This will potentially save them thousands of dollars over the course of their preferred two year wait to get married.
An older man marries a woman quickly after his wife dies so that she will get his Social Security benefits when he passes away. His view? Why shouldn’t someone get the benefits he has paid into for his entire life?
The list goes on of the way marriage is abused for financial gain, but you get the point.
When same-sex couples wed, they wed because it means something to them. It’s the best protection we have, albeit flawed federally and in most states, for our partners and ourselves. It’s a validation of our relationship, our love and our commitment to each other and yes, it affords some benefits and protection on a state level IF the state recognizes same-sex partnerships. It certainly isn’t for financial gain, as some who oppose same-sex marriage claim… at least not until all states and the federal government consider same-sex couples equal to their straight counterparts.
It’s a slap in the face each time we have to put “single” on a form or pay that extra 25% in taxes, or worse, when faced with health challenges and retirement. It’s a slap in the face each time a straight couple marries for added financial benefits based solely on marital status. It’s a slap in the face to us each time one of us is turned away from an ill partner in the hospital. It’s a slap in the face that though we pay more in taxes, we have fewer rights to the benefits and protection that many heterosexual couples take for granted.
It’s tragically ironic that we have been subsidizing straight couples through our lifelong contributions to Social Security, welfare and worker’s compensation since the inception of these programs. Yet, our partners do not receive the spousal benefits that straight couples get automatically. So when those opposed to equality in  marriage cry out that legalizing same-sex marriage would break the system, I shout, “Then stop living off of my back!” I challenge any straight couple to turn down these benefits that they receive based solely on whether or not they are married. Stop allowing me to subsidize you.  I challenge you to honor my equality.

Winning the right to marry in several states is certainly a step in the right direction towards equal treatment. However, until the federal government acknowledges unions between ALL COUPLES as marriages, with all the same rights on a local, state and federal level, we have a long, long way to go. Currently gay couples consistently pay much more in taxes, benefits, legal fees and insurance than their heterosexual married counterparts. Civil unions don’t protect you fully and neither do domestic partnerships. The definition of these two “alternatives” varies widely from state to state. Marriage is marriage is marriage.

gay-dollar

Recently in their Money section, the New York Times ran an article entitled The Higher Lifetime Costs of Being a Gay Couple. I’m not gonna lie. It pissed me off. The Times hypothetical worst case scenario costs a lesbian couple a whopping $467,000 more over the course of their committed relationship than their straight counterparts — almost half a million dollars is the cost of being with your same-sex partner. (That’s some big, beautiful house, eh?)

This article puts things into a black and white perspective and clearly shows an element of continuing discrimination simply because we choose partners of the same sex. The NYT investigation looked at the obvious culprits, but considering that there are over 1,138 federal protections, rights and benefits that are based solely on marital status, no investigation could possibly cover all the ways in which we… well… get screwed.

To read the rest of the article, click here:

http://aworldofprogress.com/gay-couples-get-hit-in-the-pocketbook-repeatedly/

HHS to create national resource center for LGBT seniors

Saturday, October 24, 2009
posted by Loren A. Olson M.D.

October 23, 2009

sebeliusHealth and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius has announced plans to create a National Resource Center for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Elders.  HHS estimates a population of between 1.5 to 4 million LGBT persons over 60, and cites the necessity of the program due to a lack of resources for caregivers to assist the specific needs of LGBT seniors.

The press release explains:

The LGBT Resource Center will help community-based organizations understand the unique needs and concerns of older LGBT individuals and assist them in implementing programs for local service providers, including providing help to LGBT caregivers who are providing care for an older partner with health or other challenges.

The Administration on Aging will award a single Resource Center grant at approximately $250,000 per year, pending availability of funds.  Eligible entities will include public-private nonprofit organizations with experience working on LGBT issues on a national level.

Source: GayPolitics.com

 

Why Bother to Come Out at Forty?

Thursday, October 22, 2009
posted by Loren A. Olson M.D.
“Why would a forty year old man come out, anyhow, He’s too old to have sex?”

I was speaking to Catherine Turner at the Services and Advocacy for GLBT Elders (SAGE) office in New York City where I had gone to discuss my book about coming out in mid-life.  She said that one of their young male staffers had made that comment when they were discussing older LGBT coming out.

I told the story to my agent the next day.  She’s a little younger than me, but close enough in age to see the humor in the young man’s comment.  He made three mistakes:

1. Forty is just the beginning of middle age.

2. Men and women have sex far beyond forty years of age.

3. Being gay is about far more than just having sex.

As a man who came out at forty, I had heard the comment that men were over-the-gay-hill when they turned thirty.  I was already 10 years behind the curve.  The image of the physically fit twenty-something man does fit the stereotype (which gay people have bought into as much as heterosexuals) but it certainly does not fit reality.

Frank Kameny's Gay Memorabilia

 Frank Kameny’s collection of gay rights memorabilia, on display in Washington D.C.

Although sexual functioning does begin to change as people get older, in fact, for many it improves.  As one matures, sexuality expands beyond just an orgasm to incorporate a much larger idea of what love-making is about.  In fact, that often forms the basis for relationships of younger men with older men.

With men and women living to be much older than they did before, forty is barely middle-age.  The fifth decade more aptly defines middle age and some have identified it as the most stressful decade of men’s lives (a little younger for women).

During the fifties men begin to feel the impact of middle age a little more:

  •  
    • Aging of parents
    • Changes in health
    • Obituaries are scanned for the names of friends
    • Careers plateau
    • Physical changes become more noticeable
    • Changes in sexual function

As men mature, sex does diminish as the organizing force of one’s life and there is a greater sense of mastery and autonomy.  As men become older they may begin to distance themselves from an all-encompassing gay identity, and their identity is integrated with all other aspects of their lives.  Men who have concealed their sexual orientation may face a new sense of urgency about coming out, and may have a less concern about the losses they have feared would come with public disclosure.

As one passes through that fifth decade, it is possible to enjoy a new sense of freedom not experienced by younger men.  I would love to have a conversation with that young SAGE staffer.

In Coming Out: Losses Loom Larger than Gains

Saturday, October 17, 2009
posted by Loren A. Olson M.D.

There is an economic theory that says, “Losses loom larger than gains.”  It suggests that for all of us, as we think about making decisions, we more easily focus on what will be lost than what will be gained.  I think this lies behind a lot of the reason why men who believe they are gay may choose not to come out, at least not for a while.

 Each of us knows what we have, and presumably we have it because we believe we want those things.  We know what we have and aren’t sure we want to let go of it.

 On the other hand, the future is uncertain.  We can’t know what it is like to live a gay life until we have begun to do so.  Most of us who have made the decision to come out realize after having done so that the losses were less than we anticipated and the rewards are greater.

 One of my favorite sayings is that “All of life’s important decisions are made without enough information.”  We must take a leap of faith.

Cam to Cam with your Physician?

Friday, October 16, 2009
posted by Loren A. Olson M.D.

            Internet camera communication is being used for a wide variety of purposes —  from business conferencing, to military families with deployed loved ones, and yes, virutual sex, but will video visits with your doctor substitute for face to face visits?  Virtual visits to your doctor could improve efficiency and access for both the doctor and the patient.  http://abcnews.go.com/Video/playerIndex?id=7530334

"Bringing Back the House Call, Virtually"

Dr. Olson appearing on "Bringing Back the House Call, Virtually" ABC News, Good Morning America

 

            Some possible uses for video calling with your doctor:  

  • Introductory visits
  • Follow-up where a physical examination is not required, eg. Reporting lab results, refilling routine medications
  • Consultation with specialist with limited availability

            Although we have more psychiatrists per capita in the U. S. than any other country, 50% of those with significant depression cannot access psychiatric care. The important book, Crisis, http://www.crisisbook.org/ relates the stories of forty gay men and women who have struggled with the conflicts of coming out as young men and women, but the problems of older men who have sex with men, particularly those who do not self-define as gay, is rarely discussed except in sensational headlines as someone’s secret life is exposed.   

            These men, who often live hidden lives, are also at great risk for depression, alcohol and drug abuse, and sexually transmitted diseases.  A video call might allow access for them to an otherwise unavailable, gay-supportive health care provider.

            Although video calling is frequently used for anonymous virtual sex, these contacts, just like contacts in the real world, can lead to intimate personal relationships that are based on friendship rather than sex.   While some men are seeking only a quick orgasm, others are finding access to a diverse group of gay men who have struggled successfully with this conflict. 

            While cam to cam counseling may not be as good as face to face consultation, it may offer be the only alternative available to some men.  Where it has been used for counseling, acceptance has been high.  Insurance companies usually deny payment for these visits, but the costs may be offset by less time from work.

A Child’s Perspective on Gay Marriage

Tuesday, October 13, 2009
posted by Loren A. Olson M.D.

            My daughter expected that there might be a few difficult questions when she told my granddaughters about my upcoming marriage.  Although Doug has been a fundamental part of my life for over 20 years, and the entire lives of my granddaughters, from time to time they had said things like, “I didn’t know that two men slept together.”

            My daughter began to prepare them, “You know we’re going to Iowa soon.”

            “Yes,” they responded.

            “We’re going because Grandpa and Doug are getting married,” my daughter went on.

            Then, my granddaughter responded, “Really? Who are they marrying?”

            “Well – They’re getting married to each other.”

            Puzzled, my granddaughter said, “That’s weird.”  After a long, thoughtful pause, my granddaughter asked, “Will there be cake?”

            In the innocent mind of a child, the most important question about gay marriage is, “Will there be cake?”

          Cupcakes at our wedding

Cupcakes at our wedding

 

 

                My granddaughters are just old enough that they had recently had “the talk” about sex.  As they drove to Iowa for the wedding, they had some questions.

            “You mean you have to do THAT every time you want to have a baby?”

            “Yes,” my daughter responded. 

            It was quiet in the back seat for a long time, until one of them asked, “Will Grandpa and Doug be doing that?”

            Quickly, my daughter responded, “No, they don’t want children.”  Sometimes, just knowing that there will be cake is enough.