Why am I Gay?
I was asked to do a guest blog for Queer Magazine:
I receive this question almost daily
I receive this question almost daily on my website MagneticFire: “I am a younger man but I have always preferred men 15-20 years older than I am. Even as I get older, the men I am attracted to, also get older. My gay friends don’t understand. Why am I attracted to older men?”
The exact reason we’re gay or attracted to specific types of gay men or women is not known, but we do know some things. Most complex psychological issues are best explained by looking at a combination of factors including genetics, our developmental history and our social and cultural experiences. Most of us who are gay believe we were born this way, and a genetic explanation may underlie some of this, but it is probably not a sufficient explanation for a predisposition to being gay or to whom we’re attracted.
Scientists tend to want precise explanations, and they often look exclusively to specific areas for clarification. In the area of being gay and partner choices the areas most commonly considered are: genes, parenting, culture, and stressful life events. But the strongest scientific evidence only comes through randomized controlled experiments. These are impossible to conduct in studying LGBTQ issues because much of our community is hidden, logistically and financially they are difficult, and such studies would also raise certain ethical concerns.
Whether we’re considering health or disease, mental illness or personality traits, the explanations are typically found in looking at the interaction of multiple factors. Prevailing attitudes are to look at most things in biological terms, but a broader perspective is needed; biological explanations for LGBTQ are insufficient. Although one factor may weigh heavily, or not at all, a combination of genetics, psychological development and social and cultural factors must all be considered. These things are all involved in its cause, how it manifests itself, its course over time, outcomes and finally, how it impacts the course of how well each of us adapts to the stress of being different.
The relative importance of any one factor varies from individual to individual.
A tendency toward extroversion is commonly thought to be inherited, for example, and this may help some to navigate the process of coming out more easily. Likewise, some many have inherited a greater capacity for empathy which could create a different pathway for development of sexual orientation and relationships.
To read the rest of the essay, click here.
[...] received this post from _______ Graham, in response to an earlier blog post, “Why am I Gay?” where I’d written that I think that a gay gene may be necessary but sufficient to explain why [...]