Some refer to the Internet as the crack cocaine of sexual addiction; I once spoke with one man who said that he had masturbated 13 times that day. For him, Internet sex was a quick and easy way to feel numb.

Sexual addiction is a controversial concept with its validity as a diagnosis challenged, not only by many psychiatrists and other mental health professionals, but a majority of the general public believes that sexual addition is just an excuse for cheating.

“Symptom Checklists for Sexual Addiction” are frequently published in print and on web sites. Questions include: Do you purchase pornography? Are you preoccupied with sex? Do you feel bad about your sexual behavior? Do you hide your sexual behavior from your partner? Has your sex behavior interfered with your family life? I doubt there is any man who is coming out in midlife that can answer “No” to any of those questions.

For some sex is their only source of pleasure, soothing and acceptance while for others it guards against loneliness, emptiness and depression. Others seem addicted to a constant flow of validation and approval from complete strangers in order to compensate for their inability to approve of themselves.

For still others, constant sex is what gay men are supposed to do. Gay men are supposed to have sex all the time and ignore their needs for love and intimacy.

The pain of those seeking relief seems real enough. Psychiatrists contend that there are multiple psychiatric disorders which can have compulsive sexuality as one of the symptoms.

Most of the clinical descriptions of sexual addiction are taken from the treatment for alcoholism and drug abuse. Although the science associated with sexual addiction appears to be on the thin side, treatment programs based on talk therapy and 12-step programs continue to expand across the country.

A diagnosis of “Hypersexuality Disorder” is being considered for inclusion in The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of the American Psychiatric Association in its fifth revision. As proposed, it is a condition characterized by a progressive disorder of intimacy, compulsive sexual thoughts and acts, fixation on an unattainable partner, compulsive masturbation and compulsive love relationships. The diagnosis would require that certain psychiatric conditions where hypersexuality is a symptom be considered and eliminated before the diagnosis could be made.

1. Molly says:

   June 14, 2010 at 9:37 pm

   Thanks for this. I think this is still a fairly new concept to most people, and unfortunately, not taken very seriously. Hopefully in the next few years, great strides will be made in the diagnosis, treatment and recovery from this disorder.

   This is a great website on the subject – http://www.thecenterforhealthysex.com/

   Alexandra Katehakis, the founder of the organization, is a certified sex addiction therapist, certified sex therapist, and supervising consultant for the International Institute of Trauma and Addiction Professionals (IITAP). She also wrote a groundbreaking book on sex addiction recovery called “Erotic Intelligence” which is the first book to address how to integrate sex after a person becomes “sober” from compulsive sexual behaviors. I highly recommend checking out the center’s website as linked above and the book – http://www.thecenterforhealthysex.com/eroticintelligence/book/

   Thanks again for the post, and spreading awareness.